Possible Changes for Stupid Perks
I'm gonna start by saying there are some pretty garbage, both killer and survivor. We all know it. Here's a list of some I think should be changed, and some possible solutions. No particular order.
This is not Happening - This is a worse Resilience. Who honestly runs this perk? It's meant for people who aren't good enough to hit a great skill check, but if you're that bad, you're not doing anything until you're healed anyways. I think this should make you crouch/walk/run faster when you're injured, like maybe 5% or so. Not exactly OP, but now it's actually useful to people that can't seem to find a way to heal.
Slippery Meat - This is only good if you're playing against Trapper. I get that at high ranks, he becomes popular again, but it's still only 1 out of 10 or so games. That and the fact that it's unpredictable. I honestly don't know anybody that actually runs this perk. Seriously, just make it easier to free yourself from a hook by a significant amount, like 5-10%, and take away the extra attempts.
Flip Flop - This is an anti-slugging perk that doesn't have the benefits of preventing slugging. With already slim chances of getting slugged, this actually does nothing to get you off the ground. This combo'd with a faster wiggle bar would actually be pretty sick if you could pull it off though. Might actually make it used.
Buckle Up - It's an anti-slugging perk towards other survivors, except everyone should be smart enough to recover as much as they can if they're getting slugged. This should also reveal auras of survivors that are being carried.
Sole Survivor - This perk is only good as your friends get killed, and even then, it's a very unlikely chance that it'll end up being used. Another one that I have never seen used except for getting Adept Laurie. I don't even know what to say for this one. Perhaps make so you work faster, or have more range at aura/terror radius readings as more people fall. Honestly, I would just ditch the perk for something new though.
Wake Up - 15%? Neat. See exit gates? Neat. Still not worth the waste of a perk spot. Maybe let it affect all survivors? A little razzmatazz like that or so?
No One Left Behind - It's for the bloodpoints, I get it, but it doesn't give enough since it only works towards altruism. It should be either more bloodpoints to make it a significant amount, or it should allow for a mend type deal for yourself when you free someone (like a reverse borrowed time).
Coulrophobia - If they're healing in your terror radius, either you have Nurse's to catch them, or you most likely won't catch them healing. Can only see this being run with Distressing, but only when I use 2 inch thick glasses. How about the effect persists for X seconds afterward leaving the terror radius? Make it not OP, but something like 15 seconds.
Beast of Prey - Like how is this good? I don't even need to explain myself, do I? I think it should allow for bloodlust sooner, and it can even keep the getting rid of the red stain. It's pretty sick, but when it takes 15 seconds to do so, it's not good anymore.
Territorial Imperative - Will happen a total of probably once per game, but you have to be pretty far away. If there's someone hooked in the basement, well, you'll find out anyways. Get rid of the cooldown and shorten the distance and it'll be bonkers enough for me.
Monstrous Shrine - IF you get basement, it kills them faster. Why do you want this again? Unless you're a basement camper... Along with the lower escape chance and whatnot, I think this should apply a hindered status to anyone that is/has been in the basement that will persist for 5 or so seconds. Removes the need to basement camp, and makes it go onto the honorable mentions list.
These are ones that I personally don't find useful, but I can see them being useful in certain likely situations. However, I don't think these should be changed significantly, if at all.
Deja Vu - This perk is really garbage, but it's great for getting people used to the game when they first start. I just wish it showed up less on my bloodweb.
No Mither - This can actually be useful when combo'd with something like DS/Resilience/Dead Hard, but I don't see how it's better than Unbreakable. You're permanently injured, and the killer knows you're going to pick yourself up. Not worth it to me.
Solidarity - You save like 5 seconds by using this perk, assuming it's maxed. Not worth the perk spot, but at least it does something, amiright?
Tenacity - Oooooh, crawl faster. You're either getting slugged or you aren't. Useful when it happens, but doesn't happen enough, and it still doesn't pick you up. (Not gonna lie, I love this perk, but it's so useless most of the time.)
Insidious - This is only good if you're doing a basement camp Leatherface, which means you're one toxic a-hole but it's hilarious so this one stays.